It’s a good thing I don’t send out alerts each time I update, right Lisa Saw your blog yesterday, and totally agree. One alert a day is enough; three times a week works even better.
It’s a beautiful Saturday in New York (for winter.) So why am I not out and about? I will be later, but I actually hate beautiful Manhattan weekends as they’re so crowded. Many New Yorkers do the majority of their socializing during the week to stay away from the crowds.
A week or so ago on a not beautiful day, I was in a weird mood. Weird, even by my standards.
I wrote a post that was a fictionalized version of a friendship. Within an hour of posting it I regretted it. I could have taken it out, and if I had Word Press 1.5 then, would have deep layered it in a page within a page within a page. Can’t tell you how great Word Press 1.5 is.
I’m a total luddite, and yet even I keep on finding new and exciting things in it. If it only had a decent spell check, it would be sheer perfection.
So I wrote fiction or fact. It was a kind of an apology for letting my imagination run rampant. I didn’t mean to hurt anybody, especially an old friend who I think is brilliant. While we have a weird type of friendship, I respect him. I once again, prove to myself, that I can’t use anybody I like, respect, or care about, in a post, article or book. That leaves…one or two people i might be able to talk about.
Doesn’t even matter if the person is dead. I hate myself afterward. Even if I save it in draft form and never let anybody see it.
Life was so much easier in the 80′s, when I just had to worry about my virtue, in the morning.
Everybody owns their own story. Everybody owns their own truth. That doesn’t mean everybody owns the right to print anything that they’re thinking at that moment. At least I don’t have that right because I care too much about hurting people.
If it makes this person feel any better I did pay for putting in that post, and fiction or fact.
Somebody baited me. I took the bait, and let that person make me look like an idiot. The friend of sorts, who I used as a jumping off point for that post was away which made it worse. I was a friggin coward besides everything else.
I’m always honest to my own perceptions. That doesn’t mean my perception is the correct one. It’s just the way I see things at that second. It doesn’t mean that my perceptions are less accurate than other peoples. Before I begin getting comments goading me about perception of truth coloring my op-ed type posts, it won’t work.
Not now. I don’t believe in blocking comments because I believe that blogging is a forum for people to talk rationally about ideas, news and other things.. But if I have to block certain people I will.
Our perceptions are our truth. I can talk about that subject until the beginning of the next century. I won’t.
For the record, once more, all my op-ed type pieces are true. There’s so much distortion in this country right now I could never play a part in distorting things more.
,
This is my version of an apology. I hope it’s accepted. If it is not; I can live with that because I deserve it.
Hey CD, I’ll comment on the first part about NY. I remember last I was there that Tues was the night to go out. Which day is it now?
S’tll Tuesday–couldn’t resist that one. Love Annie Lenox; loved the 80′s which was my decade–well they all were except for the 90′s–hated that decade, but did a lot.
Just happened to go to my friend, Mr-Who-knows-everybody-and-everything’s late afternoon salon, and asked his friends because most are guys who are both younger and prettier than me, and not even gay, for a sort of not random sample of Manhattanites.
Every night but Friday or Saturday, but they’re all paartee people.
The girls, me included, go out whenever somebody we know is playing somewhere and for dinner, any night but weekends which includes Thursday, and has for many years.