Things I do when I’m having an anxiety attack:
1) Tell myself totally stupid jokes and laugh at them out loud
2) Analyze Alice’s mothers very interesting email about Craig of Craigslist–no really, it was a highpoint of my night. If it were up to me the Empress of Wonderlandornot would never be put in moderation!
2A) When I was exactly Alice’s age, I went to Europe by myself, met people on the plane and traveled with them. This was very cool except that everybody else had backpacks. I had matched off white luggage. Found it interesting that while my parents couldn’t control my life, they could control my luggage. Still do, but now I find it adorable. Then…. And luggage has so many layers.
3)Look for more split ends to split.
4) Wonder how I can tell if hair Trauma something leave in conditioner really works 107% more than regular leave in conditioner.. wonder why they would say that. Wonder why I’m not alone in wondering this. Have had discussions with people about it
5) Worry about the man upstairs–my neighbor, not that one, because it’s Saturday night and he’s been home since about nine. As he’s the building drunk this isn’t usual for him. He usually takes Sunday off.
6) Wonder why I am actually going to hear a Hasidic Reggae singer on Monday night. Going with Lucia and Little Luce. Don’t think it’s Little Luce that really wants to see him. This is the singer and music.
7) Think up ways to further sabotage my nominations
8) While I’m at that think up ways to further sabotage my life
9) Wonder what the weather is going to be like on Monday. Should I just get a manicure or a mani/pedi?
10) Become angry, for the billionth time, that Viggio Mortenson wasn’t nominated for an Oscar. Heath Ledger just didn’t do it for me. Did invent the vibrator rating system for films because of Viggio’s performance in A history of Violence
11) Find an amazing split end. Know my hair feels very soft and looks like a $250 hair cut should look. Understand that the split ends happen because my nails are in desperate need of a manicure.
12) Realize that I know and care much too much about hair and nail salons. Know every nail salon in this part of the Upper West Side. Am faithful to my hair stylist; have to be, he’s the other best friend. But change nail salons monthly. There’s a Viet Namese one in Santa Monica in Santa Monica Place, a normal mall but the only one I can stand, that I will be faithful too. Yes one of the reasons that I’m thinking of moving to Santa Monica is because I found a nail salon that I can possibly be faithful too.
Took many pictures of nail salons in expensive parts of SoCal because they would be so cheap here, and I knew nobody would believe me without evidence.
13) Wonder what kind of person can afford a trip, has carved out time for it, but just can’t plan it. Well I know what kind of person–me, but wonder why I’m being so lethargic when I live for trip planning.
14) Try to analyze why writing in my blog and making lists calms me down. Decide to skip the self-analysis
15) Check my spam. This isn’t compulsive but the reason my gmail account was suspended, I realize as I get at least 400 a day. Didn’t delete it for nine days, paid the price.
Now I am compulsive about deleting it and putting the number in a google bar window. At the end of the day I count it. Why? Because it makes me sick to have so much clutter in my computer when I already have a filthy monitor.
16) Wonder if I have any brilliant life advice and wisdom for people. Nah, none that I can think of.
17) Decide that I’m falling asleep and really don’t want to fall into my keyboard.