I realize that this is about four posts in one. Sorry. I was depressed when I wrote it. My aunt was dying. It was the anniversary of my father’s death and I have only begun to miss him in recent years. It was a very depressing week. When I write like this, I’m exploring one aspect of me.

I make myself sound friendless which is far from true. I do think that the first few years after 9/11, as they affected New Yorkers, should be discussed.

From the very beginning the “theme” was resilience. And we were.

However, the 9/11 families weren’t the only people to suffer. It feels as if talking about other peoples pain is verboten. I believe that enough time has passed to begin to talk about this because it is important to understand.

I used to date somebody who never once went back to his apartment in Battery Park City. My neighbor moved three times in the first three years looking for a place she could feel rooted in. Just two fast examples. Ultimately they did find peace.

My IVillage horoscope:

Take an honest inventory of your life. If you’re totally truthful, you’ll see you lead a pretty fantastic existence — and a pretty busy one, too. So stop beating yourself up over what you think is lacking.

I’m very sad. I feel very vulnerable. Fragile. Not nice. I miss my parents. Some of my friends left New York for other cities.

Most left this life, not willingly, but from AIDS. Their deaths might have been prevented or their lives lengthened…I don’t want to go there.

Then there were the friends, friends of years, who I fought with or they fought with me or…after 9/11. Read more…

There’s a more thought out 3WW below this post. I closed comments on this post. Please read the post below. I have family problems and…

My mother’s sister, not the cute Buddhist artist, but the beautiful brilliant loner middle sister has end stage Alzheimer’s. Read more…

My last 3 Word Wednesday in the old Courting.
The tulips were drooping in the solid lead crystal plain vase she had forever. She had read an article in Vogue years ago that showed Diana Vreeland’s apartment, and how taste could make a house appear elegant for not all that much money. Vreeland had a vase of drooping tulips over a piano. She had never forgotten how simple and interesting it was.

When the vase broke, Dinah was shattered.

I know. I wasn’t going to blog again until the new Courting. I make up rules so that I can change them. I was just going to throw in some pictures, but, uh….The post below this one is the one I care about

On the first sorta warm, not too cloudy, no rain in the forecast, day I walked from Coney Island to Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn. I didn’t include pictures of Brighton Beach, Manhattan Beach or Seagate, three Brooklyn hoods I walk through to get to Sheepshead Bay.
I love getting lost and always put in some getting lost time. Alas I have begun to know these neighborhoods too well. Read more…

Buffy Holt who is one of the best writer/bloggers I know, sister will be walking the Susan Komen Walk to stop breast cancer. Please read Buffy’s post. It’s very moving and very needed.

There will be a new Courting shortly. It will be way different yet similar. This is my last post until the new blog. I am so out of here–it’s 65 degrees.

There’s a less depressing one below this. I had consumed the better part of a bottle of wine when I wrote the post below. I actually still like it. This is me hung over.
She was lonely. When he left he had told her that she was both a pity f–k and a pity friend.

She had come to New York for him. Helped him get established. He had thought that as soon as he arrived in New York, his star would shine and he would be discovered.

They never lounged around. She went from gallery to gallery with photos of his work. She bought the loft that they lived in and he worked in. Of course she put it in his name. It was the 1950′s. The bank told her that she needed him to cosign though she put down the deposit and mortgage payments. The bank strongly advised that they keep it in his name. She put the money in the bank, and he signed the checks.

She was a temp, going from law firm to law firm, wherever they needed legal secretaries to work the graveyard shift.

She trusted him to use her money wisely. In her heart she knew that the investments were foolish. Legal secretaries made good money, but he could spend money so quickly. He told her that he was spending for success. He told her that one day they would live in riches and glory.

In high school and college people had raved about his canvases. She knew one day he would make it.

After two decades she was tired. Her legs would be swollen from making the rounds during the day. Her eyes were tired from pouring over legal documents at night, and writing the press releases he demanded of her. Read more…

Have you guessed the time Gonzales is going to resign to get a free years supply of Ben & Jerrys? My younger friends, in their teens, are very very into this. So are their parents who were totally apathetic because they didn’t believe change would come. They became apathetic after the Florida election, because democracy wasn’t working.

It would be incredible, amazing, wonderful beyond belief if the firing of the prosecutors is the one action that brings down Bush & Comp and more than a lot ironic.

I bought a new camera to replace the one that went into the sea. It’s not a simple point and click, so I practiced on objects as it was too cold to practice on the street.

I love glass. It’s pure and calming to me. This is just a bit of the glass objects. Some are Scottish paperweights. Scottish sand’s supposed to be the best for glass making.

I disliked Murano until they began to make door knobs

These pictures only reflect one side of me. My blog feels the same. When it’s made over, issues will be on a sidebar as Courting’s really about stories.

I can tell real stories about each object and I can make some stories up. When I first began blogging, I was “forced” to defend the veracity of my stories. At the time I had only written one fiction post, but it wasn’t clearly marked “fiction.” As the woman kept morphing into different identities, well, it was obviously fiction.

I have never had a wonderful feeling about blogging. It doesn’t make me all warm, happy and comfortable.

I deeply regret getting so deep into issues because it wasn’t fun, and began my love hate issues with comments.

The new Courting will be a more peaceful place. One where I can feel comfortable telling stories, whether true or fiction.

Lately I have been very reflective and wondering why I even call myself a writer. Yeah, I have had over 50 articles published, but I can’t say that I have been trying to be published.

Before I did become a professional writer, many people including my mother would ask why I wasn’t one. I had a stock answer:
There are nine million people in the naked city and 8.75 million think they’re writers.

Maybe I was right. I just don’t know.

Happy Birthday MizzyB





My grandmother is in the purple. It was taken from a photograph that my aunt painted. My grandmother was a suffragette. My Mom was very proud. This post is in my grandmother and mother’s memories. My aunt’s a great artist and I think I will photograph her stuff and sell it here.
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EC is NOT the same thing as Mifeprex or RU-486. EC will not terminate an existing pregnancy. EC will not work if a woman is already pregnant.

To women from my generation, the first generation to grow up with the pill, this is a miracle. Because you’re not always on the pill. Other contraception can more easily fail.

I do remember giving condoms the balloon test. I remember one July 4th weekend with my boyfriend Zachary.

I really really would have gotten this pill had it been avaliable and then I would have never had to make a decision I have never regretted but found almost impossible to make.

I was a “mistake.” Never to me, my entire extended family and friends, but always to my birth mother. I lived in a foster home, just for four months. I know how amazing and random life is. I strongly believe that all women and girls should have access to birth control.

This pill prevents the egg and sperm from ever meeting. Girls and women are raped.

This pill is available to women, eighteen and over,without a prescription. Younger girls can get it with a prescription. Don’t ever be ashamed of asking for it.

It can save you from the most difficult decision you will ever have to make whether you decide to keep the pregnancy or terminate it.

You can make the choice to be pregnant or not.

That’s power.

Real power.

Please use a condom until you know everything you need to know about your partner. But accidents happen. Rape happens.

You have one modicum of control. Control equals power. You can choose not to become pregnant if you’re raped or didn’t use birth control or suspect that it might have failed. And I don’t know why but women usually know. We just do.

Make yourself powerful.

When I looked at the list of popular subjects, today being the fourth anniversary of the war didn’t even make the cut. Second Life did. Sometimes I feel as if I have been living a version of Second Life over the past 28 months. I read about Second Life being a therapeutic tool. I would buy into that, if I didn’t know how many obsessives use the Internet as a substitute for doing. It really makes you feel as if you’re accomplishing something. Sometimes it’s necessary. Sometimes, it’s the opposite. It’s very hard to tell when you’re actually online.

I would say that it’s a lot better than Texas Hold em, but many people play Second Life for real money. Spring is sprunging and there’s nothing better than real life for practicing techniques for real life.

I will be at a candle lit rally tonight against the war. Four years. We have to get out. We have to get this country’s priorities straight.

Here’s a Times select article for all of you who think if only Reagan were president

When Courting’s redesigned I will have a space for newspaper articles and will copy the select ones. I will also emphasis my fiction as I think it’s my biggest strength
A link to my latest fiction post. It’s steamy and good. Want to highlight the fiction in my new blog.








These are clickable

This is a firehouse in my hood. Count the plaques. In the hood, another lost eleven and still another thirteen.

I will never forget. Read more…

Leahy wants Rove to testify over the fired prosecutors. My heart be still. And here is one of the loves of my life, Frank Rich, on four years. Read the Barbara Bush quotes. She’s a model of compassion. It’s a Select article so read it quickly

My new blog will have a place for rants and for articles so I don’t have to muck up the post. I will copy the select articles as I pay enough.

The silent auction was held in an overly dressed hotel reception hall that made Delilah
feel as if she were choking.

Then she saw him sitting at the table. For a second she wanted to be angry. Read more…

The other day New York City released almost a million debts because the collection agencies couldn’t show the back paperwork telling the history of the debt or if in fact money was really owed.

Like I would buy a subscription to Car & Driver? I paid the $47 I turned out to “owe” because it was worth it to me to make the phone calls stop.

And I have a blog. I don’t get mad. I do get even. I’m very proud of my Allied Interstate page
I don’t know how many comments there are in the page and two posts, but they make for much interesting reading than the actual post. All comments, rants etc about Allied belong in that page
∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞
The words come from Bone.

“I’m the wanderer, yeah the wanderer.”

Ann still thought of her as a 20 year old hippie anti-war agitator with good manners. She would invite them over and always invite some single girls who looked like Richard Nixon’s daughters. Ann had never forgiven her for being the one to leave. But she knew that Ann insisted Rose be placed in this nursing home because of Delilah’s rep. Read more…