I have been very patient throughout this whole renovation process. I am about to lose it big time. I get many Google hits on Adrienne Shelly, the actress/writer/director, who was killed because she complained about noise to the wrong person. We came from the same not-quaint Long Island town. It doesn’t have a train station, but we grow up believing that our station in life will allow us to be listened to.

They were definitely positively going to be here 53 minutes ago. I have been understanding to the point where I feel like an idiot. But I also feel that the contractor is going through hell and I can’t add to that. I won’t gossip about that.

Thanks Bone for Three Word Wednesday and the button:

A deserted mine shaft turned into a state of the art house, West Virginia, 2030

Nell wanted to get out of bed almost more than she wanted Justin. Of course she wanted to be out of bed more but that seemed so disloyal to Justin who had gone through so much to get her. Nell felt a character in a NanoQuinRomance novel. Everybody read them. Since the Big Eleven had taken over the work world and people were happy in their jobs romance was an increasingly rare commodity. People took their long vacations in groups.

Nell knew that she was lucky. She was damned if she would let the ISB, the chips, Denny, Nadia or the other people in her body take her down. It had taken her years to admit to Justin that she had first fallen in love with him in Pre-K, and would do anything to take the impulsive truly stupid marriage to Denny back. If only so that she could say in old age, Justin was her first and only husband. Justin always said that a marriage made under false pretenses didn’t count. But she had allowed it.

Justin jolted her back into the moment when he asked what she was thinking about:
How lucky I am. Damn Justin I have to get them all.
We’ll get them.
I think this is my fight. I think I have to out will them.
Who?
All of them. I have always out thought opponents. They’re counting on me not thinking, and damn I’m fading.
Can you tell when they’re out?
I can’t hear them or feel what they’re doing. Feel as if I’m covered in quicksand. Can’t explain it anymore. But sometimes I know what they said or what was said.
••••••••••••••••••••••
Cornelia wanted to play. Why was somebody else talking from her body? Who was this person snuggled up to her? Ella, that was Ella, sort of her baby side. Cornelia knew that they were supposed to take over Nell’s body. It would be Cornelia’s body; she would use Ella as she used everybody. Bye bye Nell!!! When Cornelia was out she wouldn’t remember any of this. It was good to have Ella to take over. Ella was harmless. Cornelia could rest. She didn’t like to rest when she was out. Life was too exciting. She bet Rachel, Nell’s best friend, would sleep with her. Rachel was known for sleeping with anybody who had money or was interesting. Sleeping with Rachel was a sign that somebody had made it. There was more gossip about Rachel in zines than about pop stars. She didn’t want to sleep with Nadia or Denny. Nadia was ugly and Denny was as bad in bed as he was with everything else

Cornelia would have Nell’s life. Justin would have to accept her. She was Nell; just another personality. The USB didn’t realize that the chip contained real people who had spent past two years learning all about Nell, before being put in the chip just before Nell had come to Colombia. There were others waiting to come out, but Cornelia was the favorite. She had been told this by somebody. It made more sense that other people inhabited Nell’s body than personalities.

Cornelia didn’t really care if things made sense or not. She wanted to come out. Damn Nell was garnering strength. She would have to stop that. Cornelia wished she were smarter. The voices that usually guided her when she was coming out weren’t there. Though they hadn’t guided her the last time, she just came out, this was strange. What did she do the last time? If only she was as good at thinking as she was at everything else. Ella was worse than useless. Cornelia was going to have think for her if the guides didn’t come soon. She liked the radio station that seemed to run through her head.
•••••••••••••••••••••
Nadia was livid. Ilya wasn’t getting any better. His fever was getting higher and they couldn’t stop it. If he went into delirium, he might, just might say something. She heard that Nell had been out for five hours. Three more than she should have been. The antidote couldn’t be working that well. She should be laughing. Fluids had been taken from all pores, every body opening. They weren’t going to find anything. So naive these people who thought themselves so worldly. Nadia could emit the serum at will. It had beeen so complicated, long and tortuous to make this formula, but when she and Ilya had succeeded, Nadia knew she had true power. As long as she was in any semblance of a right mind she wouldn’t let anybody know. Nadia had killed grown men when she was nine in Latvia. Her father watched while she, her mother and Ilya were gang raped. When the men were done they shot her parents. Nadia sneaked out and found her father’s gun. He had taught her well. Nobody was expecting a little girl to shoot three men in the back in rapid succession. Nadia did what had to be done to stay alive. She was the ultimate survivor. If people knew her history they would call her a sociopath. The first three deaths were innocent deaths. The rest weren’t.
••••••••••••••••••••••••
. Nell was tired but she didn’t dare go to sleep. She and Justin were were on the chaise on the terrace watching fireworks. It felt as though leaves were falling off flowers onto their heads. She knew they weren’t real fireworks but the affect was as good.

Every few minutes Justin would make Nell talk to make sure it was still her. Nell was a talker. People invited her to dinner parties to keep the conversation flowing. When they were very young, before expressways had monorails and helicopters were omnipresent people would vie for Nell to drive with them. She was better than coffee, Red Bull or the new harmless caffeine pills mixed together.

He was used to Nell, the real Nell, this Nell having boundless energy. Not diffused energy like Cornelia, but real energy. He had always thought that galaxies revolved around Nell’s star. Nell had always been able to read his mind:
You’re hating yourself for thinking that my star is fading. It is Justin, and we can’t do anything about it.

All the bones in Nell’s body seemed to shake, rattle and roll. Justin was freaked by the instant change. She appeared coarsely sexy. He didn’t know how anybody could change so quickly:
Hey, pool boy want to go into the ocean past the fireworks? Fireworks are so Millennium. I suppose we can do something here. Help me out of these clothes. You know I don’t like trousers don’t you? Even silk pajamas.
Cornelia’s eyes were burning. She almost screamed:
how did I become a size two? I’m a size double zero. Dance, we need to dance pool boy. I have to burn the calories off.

Justin’s head was spinning. If Ona and her people didn’t come up with a solution soon, he couldn’t be held responsible for his actions. Damn he would do anything not to kill Nell. He kissed Cornelia. Their sex was just that. Justin had deluded himself into believing that Nell would materialize. He wasn’t a prince kissing a toad.

Stumble it!

I’m totally losing it. I’m living in a non-worked on construction zone. I factored in everything that could go wrong but what did. I would walk away from this if there wasn’t so much money at stake. My luck it will be ready the day the last apartment is sold in Manhattan. I hate inertia. I can’t go into why I’m really upset but I’m ready to kill or be killed.

I don’t know if I have it in me to be patient anymore. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have this blog as at least a partial outlet and wish I could tell the whole story but….I know I’m overreacting but it’s the second day of no work and I hate like hell to be touched by strangers or breathed on. I needed a nice day. A day to feel good about myself and nothing went right. Little things, but lots of little things and one big thing–the ever rising costs–are the reason I’m getting out of here.

I don’t like to rush a year. The new year really began for me today. I was reading a real estate blog predicting big corrections in Manhattan this year. It would have scared me but I’m a blogger and therefore have an answer for everything.

Manhattan’s not the same Island it was in 91, last time the housing market downturned. There was much crack and crime. We have been the safest large city for years now and 07 had the least amount of murders.

Neighborhoods like mine have gone from being hip and needing work to mainstream with all the work done. Then look at Tribeca. It really picked up after 9/11 though every indicator and all common sense would have said the opposite. Downtown and the Village was much cheaper than the Upper West Side pre-9/11. Not anymore. Maybe people want to live where the action was. Maybe people just like it. I don’t know of any studies that explain this phenomena.

This is a new world we live in and I’m embracing it. I have to. I have an apartment almost for sale. This is week ten of me living in a construction site. It’s going slower than anticipated for reasons not of my doing. And I did factor in problems. I’m trying to be Zen about this. Sometimes I’m exceptionally good at that and sometimes…..

I might have a total breakdown. If I do I truly enjoyed getting to know many bloggers.

Actually it’s probably longer than that as I began Colliding Worlds when I began preping for the renovation and tomorrow will be Chapter 17, but some weeks I wrote two chapters.

You would think that this is a major renovation. You would be wrong. I just sleep in a bedroom that’s a third given over to supplies. I’m tired. I want to write that I have handed my apartment over to a broker and am out of here

Bone found this song. It’s the Colliding Worlds theme song. It’s perfect.

Don’t ask me
What you know is true
Dont have to tell you
I love your precious heart

I… I was standing
You were there
Two worlds colliding
And they could never tear us apart

We could live
For a thousand years
But if I hurt you
I’d make wine from your tears

I told you
That we could fly
cause we all have wings
But some of us dont know why

I… I was standing
You were there
Two worlds colliding
And they could never ever tear us apart

Stumble it!

Some or much of the dialogue is very trite. Hard to focus on anything but preping my apartment as the work to be done is minor yet detail oriented and what will give the apartment extra marketability. It’s a small apartment with some very elegant features and some that should be.
My friends are freaking me. Each one tells me how special our friendship is. They are all very special to me. It’s going to be hard yet it’s time. Keep running into old friends. Feel very blessed and all want to visit me, and have invited me to visit so I can never say I won’t have places to stay in New York. It’s $69 on Spirit; 90 minutes long. Takes longer to get out to the East End of the Island. My sister thinks I should move to the North Fork. Tempting but cold.

3WW has moved
Here is a page with all prior chapters, and a basic summary.
I write the chapters in advance and add the words. They are true first drafts.

When Justin stunned Nadia she tumbled half on Cornelia’s torso and half onto the bed. Cornelia looked bright eyed at Justin:
Pool boy what the f–k are you doing?

How could he explain that he was trying to save his love Nell who was in Cornelia somewhere from Nadia? Denny who was babbling about nothing in the basement prison seemed such a tame enemy compared to Nadia and her brother. Justin wasn’t sure that Ilya/Yuri had half the formula. Max walked out of the bathroom with Nadia’s bra. She didn’t really need one and not because she had breasts that looked up to God.
I’m going to take this to be analyzed. Justin do you want Ona to come in?
Not yet. I’m going to try to talk to her myself.
•••••••••••••••••••••
Nell tried to be heard but Cornelia was so dominant, and Ella wanted to come out. Nell was strong. She had survived much and wasn’t going to give into alternate personalities yet she was tired, so tired of trying to assert herself. Nell was a believer in irony. This was the most ironic situation she had ever found herself in. Her self giving into other selves. She couldn’t allow that. Could she reason with Cornelia and Ella? Probably not. She should be able to find some way to exploit their many weaknesses but no technique she knew worked on them.

Nell had a Doctorate in Psychology. She was famed for her ability to talk people down, but this chip in her brain, it was overpowering everything. It felt as though it was a huge button put on the heaviest string that wouldn’t break off and was controlled by somebody else. Or many other elses.

All she could think of were song lyrics, “please don’t go away. Is this the way it’s supposed to be?” Books she had designed were floating through her mind. Most people read ebooks and books online. Books were for the elite. Some of her books went for millions of Euro/Asia/Amer dollars. They had all been designed while she listened to music, and she couldn’t get the music she had designed the books to out of her head. Nell Lehman killed by music and her own books. No, she couldn’t allow that. She had to break out. She had to let Justin know that the formula wasn’t detectable but was in every pore of Nadia’s body. Nadia had bragged about that to Cornelia who hadn’t been listening. But Nell felt herself floating into a cacophony of music and books. She wasn’t just losing her edge she was losing herself. “Baby I wish you were here tonight….If I knew that you were here….” With every cell, neuron and the rest of the parts of her brain she still “owned” she willed herself to communicate.
••••••••••••••••••••
Cornelia beckoned to Justin by pushing her hand onto the foam bed. She had to get out of the bed but she had to have the pool boy even more. The girl had told her that she belonged to her and maybe she did but why would the pool boy be here. He took her breath away. Cornelia could hear voices in her head trying to tell her something but she was so used to them she pretended they were waves in the ocean. Sometimes she would hear music in her head; she would want to dance, and damn did she want to dance now.
Or f–k pool boy. Or both. Her voice took on a husky tone Justin hadn’t heard before:
Hey pool boy, do I know you? I remember seeing you, but did we f–k? I’m a creature of the moment. If you don’t remember my name it’s Cornelia. I guess I have a last name, everybody does, but I don’t use mine. Del does all the signing, and takes care of all the gritty details. I’m not good at anything but sex and partying. Del says that all I have to do. He prefers that I party with him but I don’t see him here. Now she says that I belong to her. I think I go to the highest bidder. You should find Del and pay him. Then I won’t belong to her anymore, and you can do whatever you want to me. What’s with her anyway? She’s like unconscious. Find Del. No, don’t. Out of sight…Give me a cigarette.

Justin shook inwardly. This wasn’t the Cornelia he had been talking to. Cornelia, but an even more childish version. Max better have the bra analyzed soon. The brain scan should come soon. Justin had brought down leaders of dictatorships; he had killed enemies of democracy with his bare hands but the many personalities of Nell was beyond him. He gave her a cigarette. She smoked it greedily and gulped a ginger/raspberry fizz Nadia had prepared with another API:
That was great. Beyond great really. Get me another. Do you have a name poolboy? Na, it’s not important. You’re just a pool boy, pool boys don’t need names. Del says I’m a princess and princesses don’t need to know servant’s names. Just use them. I’m not a real princess of course. America doesn’t have royalty. Is there a screen with gossip vids? I want to hear some. I don’t believe in reading…..

Justin’s head was spinning. He couldn’t believe one person could talk so fast. Cornelia or whoever this personality was, was so insipid. He brought her a ginger/raspberry fizz from the fridge. Ona’s voice piped into his ear.
I’m listening to everything. You have to tell her who you are and who she is.
Justin walked away and spoke softly:
Why? It hasn’t made a difference so far.
She might be receptive soon.
Do you have the brain scan?
Yes. Her brain looks perfectly normal aside from the chip. We’re experimenting with taking chips out.
And?
Ona’s sigh felt like a high C in his ear:
It’s better to keep it in until we know how to reverse the effects.
And when will that be?
I don’t know. Maybe not for weeks.
Cornelia was calling for him:
Pool boy what are you doing? Standing with your back to me. That’s rude. I dislike rudeness.
I’m not a pool boy. I’m Justin. You’re Nell, my wife, not Cornelia.
That’s absurd. Didn’t we have this conversation?
Yes, a few hours ago.
then you know I’m not Nell. Why are we even talking? There’s something about you. You’re very sexy. Come here. Your luck is about to change.

Justin sighed. He remembered that last line from an 80’s movie The Big Easy Nell had loved, and he loved watching with Nell. Was Cornelia using Nell’s memories?

For a couple of seconds her face had Nell’s expressions. He heard Ona telling him not to, but he couldn’t help himself as he flipped Nadia off the bed onto the floor and got in next to Nell/Cornelia. He wanted her so much. This might not be Nell but Justin didn’t need to pretend feelings.

She knew just how to undress him. How to touch him in places no other woman had ever thought of. They were both eager, almost too eager. She went on top of him. Their bodies fit so perfectly, they came at the same second. This was sex between two people who loved each other, or wanted each other desperately. He softly almost cried her name: “Nell?”
Yes, Justin, oh my god Justin. I don’t know how much time I have so listen. The formula comes from Nadia’s body. I don’t know how but it comes from her sweat. Denny thinks he can take over the world and he’s not completely delusional. Del’s alive, and basically a robot. The chip is going to take over my thinking soon, but you can’t take it out. When it’s taken out of people like me they turn into robot/zombies.
Justin I love you so much. Please know that. Whoever I turn into, remember that. Play music especially Jack Johnson, Warren Zevon. No don’t play music that might make it worse. I’m so confused. My memory….
We’ll make it out of this, together and whole.
You couldn’t love me more than I love you. Remember that. I don’t have your faith. Too much has happened….

They put a sheet over their bodies as Max came in and took Nadia. Even in the ultimate act of love they had no privacy. They did have each other. For the moment.

Stumble it!

It’s week six of the renovation and I have totally officially lost my mind. it’s easy to say don’t sweat the small stuff but when your home isn’t really your home, and you kind of wish you had sold “as is” which wasn’t shabby…..Well shabby chic, flood ridden and I’m the proud owner of at least seven deodorants. Every time I go away even for a weekend I forget I have one in all possible places. I support all toiletry industries especially skin care. Roz Chast had a cartoon about a tea drawer. I didn’t know she had visited me. I’m going to go from too much to just enough. But I have no idea what that means

MizzyB is back and a lot has happened in her life. Back in San Francisco and taking it over. She’s one of my best blogging friends for many reasons. See for yourself.

These are true first drafts. So true I forgot had chapter fourteen written. It’s on the sidebar. Today was the first day I could focus. I don’t want to give away the story but Nell is struggling to come out.
Here’s a page
with all prior chapters, and a summary.
A deserted mine shaft made into a state of the art home, West Virginia, 2030
Here’s 3WW’s new address.

- Nell struggled to be heard. If she could only let Justin know that she was there under Ella and Cornelia. Ella was too easy to fall into and Cornelia too dominating. She knew she wasn’t a DSM-XA diagnose for Disassociated Personality Disorder or any diagnose for Hallucinogenic or Medicated Disorders. No she was a new diagnose for implanted brain and ear chips with hallucinogenic and medicated affect.

Nell felt humiliated and scared. “Seems like your head is in the clouds…now when I come to see you you’re sitting in the light…Many is the night I stayed awake and cried….missing all the things we dreamed of….” Damn why were old country songs going through her head? She needed to become the dominant personality and all she could do was sing songs in her head while Ella or Cornelia came out. Now she began seeing Dream Girls in vivid colors “I’m not living without you…I’m not walking out…I’m not going to leave you…I’m telling you….you’re the best man…yes you are….you’re gonna love me.” Justin did love her. She knew that but maybe she was singing this song to ensure that he heard. Other lyrics came riveting through her head “The greater the love the more I want you…loving you…the sweetest….” “Don’t let us get sick, don’t let us get old….let us be brave…the moon has a face…and causes the ripples in time…I’m lucky to be here with somebody I like…make us be brave, let us be together tonight…” “It’s lonely as hell…put me in chains…I can make love or disappear…for my next trick I need a volunteer. But it’s lonely up here when the tricks have been played….” Damn Warren Zevon, why did he have a lyric for everything? Nell was going to take over. It was her frigging body. Her mind, well, some of it, but it belonged to her. The others were going to take over eventually. Probably sooner. She couldn’t let that happen.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Ella didn’t like being alone in the room. Pictures were floating through her mind. Pictures of people and things she didn’t understand. She wished the voices in her head would go away. If she could catch the pretty lights coming down, the pictures and voices would go away. But she couldn’t make the light stay in her hands. Her doll wasn’t helping her. Bad dolls should die. Bad girls should die. Ella was a bad girl. Good girls wore pretty clothes and had people. Good girls had dolls who felt soft and could find the prince and princess so that Ella could go to the palace. Ella wanted to wear a pink dress and something sparkly in her hair. Music was playing. Ella screamed so that somebody would turn it off, but nobody would. Bad Ella, bad.
•••••••••••••••••••••
Cornelia woke up. Why was she wearing a flannel night gown? What was this ludicrous doll doing next to her? She had vague memories of somebody named Ella and somebody named Nell. Had they all been at a party together? No they had been in this room. A threesome with two other women? Where was the pool boy? She wanted him more than she had ever waned Del. The pool boy’s tight body and dark blond looks made her want as she had never thought possible. Sure it was just sex but sex was everything. Cornelia believed that her mother had schooled her in the art of seduction. She didn’t remember nor did she want to. Memories were useless traps to settle stupid curiosities. Cornelia didn’t think she had ever been curious. The moment is what counts.

Damn she felt hung-over. Damn her head was on fire. Cornelia tried to get up. She fell back onto the contoured foam mattress. Most mattresses adhered perfectly to your body. This one acted as a confining cell. When she tried to get up, it would pull her back in. Cornelia remembered reading that these mattresses were now used for everybody from from infants to geriatrics. Did she read? Reading was so 1999.

Things like this had never interested Cornelia. She was much more interested in gossip. Fortunately the lead articles on the paper/zine’s were all gossip. Damn she had to get out of this bed. She wanted a f–king shower. One that was hotter than hell and massaged every ounce of her body.

Nadia walked into the room. She spoke to Cornelia as a mother would speak to a baby. Wasn’t this woman some kind of servant?
Can you get me some Advil/Percodan Insta?

Nadia looked at Nell/Ella/C with a combination of contempt and lust. Though she had no frigging idea what this personality was. Justin and she had a screaming match. Justin, who seemed so weak so easily manipulated had threatened to kill both her and Ilya if she didn’t give them the formula. The formula was in their heads. She would never let Ilya die, but she wanted Ella more than anything she could possibly imagine. In an ideal world her brother would live and she would have both Rachel and Ella but this wasn’t an ideal world. No Justin didn’t dare kill Ilya, she had told him that they both had half the formula and Ilya would never talk to anybody but her about this or anything of substance.

Lady I asked you for API. You’re supposed to do my biding. You’re just a f–king servant. Get me that pool boy, and out of this bed. I want to change into something more me. We pay you to do what I want. Del will have your head when he finds out you’re standing there not working. Our servants work for their money.

Nadia now felt just contempt for all Americans. So accustomed to getting their way though the USA hadn’t been a major player in years. Delusional they all were. This person was just the end result. Yet she lusted after her more than Ella. She could have fun with this person. Though aware that cameras and scanners were on her, Nadia went into the bathroom, took off her bra, wet it and a substance came out that she put into a glass then filled it with ginger raspberry fizz. They would never find the real source. Nobody could ever tell it really came from her body pores. She took two capsules of API. Funny how this personality wanted just what she added to her secret solution. Cornelia, that was her name. She heard Justin mention it to Ona. Ona might be a brilliant therapist and Justin could threaten to kill whoever he wanted to, but as long as they didn’t know where the source came from, she, Nadia was the winner.

Here Miss Cornelia, your fizz and API. It will make you feel great. Guaranteed.
Nadia hated the slight perk slight humble she put into her voice. She had put in just enough to keep Cornelia out. Cornelia had a feisty look so different from Ella or even Nell. She could see a bit of Nell struggling to take over. In her dreams. Ella would be good when she needed a submissive. She supposed she could have Nell when she need a fighter but she had a feeling Cornelia could fight her if she played it right.

Wow this made me feel better as soon as it went down. Thanks. Hey, would you know if Amy Winehouse was released from the camp for renegade rock stars? I hear her daughter is wilder than she was. Del claims nobody is as wild as I am. Will you help me get out of this bed? I don’t get why I can’t get out myself. I know wild went out with the Spear sisters but trouble is so much fun.

Did I have a fever? Can you prepare the shower. I feel sweaty and really hate that feeling except…well, you’re not the person I want to confess my soul to. Find the pool boy after you prepare the shower. Oh, and get out my red silk string bikini, its wrapper, and mules.

You are a demanding bitch, Nadia thought, but you’ll find your proper place soon enough.
Yes, Miss Cornelia, I will help you with everything you asked. First let me help you out of bed.

She put one arm on Cornelia’s shoulder, and tickled the sole of her left foot with the other. Before Cornelia could react, she was touching her body all over. She placed her mouth in Cornelia’s left ear and went on from there. Cornelia fought her just enough for Nadia to come. Then she focused on pleasuring Cornelia. When Cornelia could speak, she said:
Is this why you’re my servant? I don’t remember what Del said you are. Memory isn’t my strong suit. I guess it doesn’t matter if you don’t do everything I ask immediately.
Oh I’m not your servant Cornelia. You have it backwards. You’re mine, all mine. You exist to please me. You do what I say when I say to do it, do you understand?
Cornelia smiled a more radiant smile than she had ever seen on anybody:
Yes, I’m yours, all yours.

Just then the locked door unlocked. Before Nadia could do or say anything, Justin stunned her.

Colliding Worlds is basically being written for me by me during a very disruptive time in my life. Though my friends, my merry band of doormen, handyman, and super are doing everything they can to make it wonderful. Well most doormen; in the spirit of the season I won’t discuss how one doorman made me cry as he thought my tip wasn’t big enough. I’m not a crier or a screamer but I was living without Internet access, a stove, oven and microwave. Note which one is first. That’s also because my stero isn’t hooked up, I somehow packed my Ipod….

I want to thank Bone and Doug who independently of each other insisted that I go through with this. As did Cooper in her OTN way. She wrote, I think, her most wonderful post which will serve as inspiration for a future post. Dari and everybody else who truly likes this, I thank you.

Stumble it!

There is a page I’m too lazy to link to. I accidentally posted chapter fifteen for a second. I can’t belive I forgot I didn’t post this. The proceeding two chapters are more “fun.”
West Virginia, 2030
Cornelia, no Nell, no…felt herself fading back into a state she couldn’t describe to herself or anybody else. The confusion was going to end soon. She wasn’t going to care who she was or what she felt. She tried to make herself stay alert, and kept guzzling ginger raspberry fizzes. Somehow they made her feel more like herself. Nell was somebody else. The man was wrong. She could never remember his name as he was meaningless. He looked and spoke like a prince, but Cornelia knew better. She was Cornelia, par-tay girl supreme. Par-tay, last heard sometime in the second Bush admin, was enjoying a comeback as things seemed to do every 25 years. She knew this because…no, no more thinking, Cornelia hated to think. Cornelia loved to live for the moment. She should look for her mini-bikini and go to the hotel pool, but the haze, the haze was overcoming her.

Ella wanted her doll. Her doll would keep her safe in the big room. The bed was too hard. This wasn’t her room. It wasn’t her room. It wasn’t a nice room. It didn’t have lights coming down in pretty colors. It didn’t have angels to keep her safe. She wanted the woman to come and hold her. The woman did something nice to her body. The woman said she was better than a prince. She said that Ella didn’t have to understand anything. She was good the way she was.
••••••••••••••••

Justin was talking to Ona who had flown into the mine shaft. They were analyzing the tapes of his encounter with Nell. He hated this. It should be private. It shouldn’t have happened at all. It was good that Denny was in restraints in the mine prison as Justin wanted to kill him with his bare hands. People who thought Justin non-violent were mistaken. He had killed for the ISB and for Nell, he would kill anybody. Ona’s voice brought him back to the present:
Justin, I know this is hard but you have to accept reality. She might never be Nell again.
I won’t accept that.
There might be organic brain damage. It might be PTSD. It might be many things. We won’t know until we can rid her brain of the filter the USB put in, and do a laser MRI. Understanding the components of the filter is taking longer than we thought. Nadia seems to have access to formulas nobody can imagine We have called people off vacation, off other assignments, we’re working round the clock. You know we will do anything for Nell, and for you.
You said 72 hours.
We thought so, but it’s much more difficult than anybody had anticipated. If you can get Nadia to talk…If not let her be in the room alone with Nell. We can monitor everything. If we can see what she’s putting into Nell’s body, we can analyze the components. But Justin, how did you not find it?
We gave her a full body search and scanned her insides. We went over the room in New York microscopically. We only found the formula The ISC was giving her and you’ve analyzed that.
••••••••••••••••••

Justin couldn’t accept defeat. He went to the basement which had both a prison and a large room mean to put a person at a certain amount of ease. It had every amenity but there were no windows, faux or real, and metal doors which opened or closed by an iris and finger scan. Rachel was talking to Nadia. Max was sitting in the back of the room with his stun gun, and miniature new model Uzi out. Justin thought Rachel was the second most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Rachel had grown up in the house next to his. Denny and Del had lived in the house on the other side of hers. They had been oblivious of her beauty until all their friends would try to be set up with her. Justin had only been interested in Nell. He wondered if there had been something in the water in Miller’s View that made beautiful girls. He shouldn’t be thinking about that. Justin switched to professional mode and listened to Rachel:
The strange thing Nadia is that after all this I still love you. There’s something strong and different about you. I told you everything as I truly believed if you knew you would help us.
Help you? Why? Why should I help any American?
We trusted you. When we found out about Yuri we understood that you would do anything to save and help him. That’s a good trait, Nadia. But to use Nell for your own objectives….
I didn’t know if I could trust you. I love you too. And I love Ella. Yes, Ella. The ISB’s formula messed her up so much, she will never be Nell again. I only helped her reach peace.
Then tell us what you have been injecting her with. Show us…
No, not until I know Yuri’s safe. I know a place you can send him and Carol. Then maybe…
That’s good you care about Carol, but no Nadia. We can’t get Yuri here for several days. He’s being treated for a staph infection at The ISB Center. He will survive, but he can’t be moved.
A staph infection? They’re getting deadlier. He’ll die.
No, Nadia, it’s under control. The USC found him and injected him with one. They were going to torture him for the formula. But we had people there..
I can’t believe you.
Let me show you.

Max pressed a button and a large screen came down. Seconds later they saw Yuri in his hospital bed.
He looks so sick. All those boils. He’s going to die.
Speak to him Nadia. We found somebody who speaks ancient Greek but Yuri won’t answer.

The spoke for five minutes in ancient Greek. Nadia seemed less agitated but still angry at the end of the call.
He says he’s feeling better. He says the ISB was going to kill him. But look at him. You heard his voice. He’s like a little boy. I must be sent to take care of him. Only I know how.

Rachel tossed her dark curly hair away from her eyes:
That’s impossible. Help us Nadia and we’ll help you.
Oh are you going to tell me that you love me and want to take me away from everything?
The sad thing is I do.
Justin interrupted:
Nadia go to Nell’s room. She’s asking for you.
And you will have monitors and scans on me? No way.
We’ll turn them off.
I’m supposed to believe you? Nadia’s face turned red. Justin thought her the most unattractive woman and the woman who might hold the key to Nell’s future.
Yes Nadia, you’re supposed to believe me.

Stumble it!

3WW
has moved.

I’m tired of me. Lately blogging has me crazed. I don’t feel very bloggy. I was reading a blog where somebody idolized a famous blogger and writer I casually know. I don’t mean to sound bitter as I’m not, but it’s kind of like idolizing a pop idol though one who lets you into her life, or the life she wants shown–good bad whatever. I am jaded.

I’m writing fiction as I enjoy it. I’m emotionally fatigued which is a lot worse than physically fatigued. It’s not depression. It’s the beginning of understanding that I have made real life changes, and wishing that I had wise people to guide me. But I have only me, my many personalities and my myriad of friends who all are in shock but think it’s right.

I know Colliding Worlds isn’t mainstream fiction. I’m not a mainstream type of person and am doing this entire apartment renovation as my taste is so out there–Thinking about the things that weren’t up to code or looked beautiful but I quickly found out were cheap makes me sick so….My first major purchase, before the wall unit, was a would have been $400 faucet had I bought it in Gracious Home. Oddly enough people still admire its incredible lines. It has a rim of black that picks up the granite.

The old faucet fell off when I was living there a month. It looked beautiful. This is ten times prettier and way stronger. It won’t fall apart. As long as they don’t try to hook up a dish washer. Well I didn’t know. Thought everybody had dishwashers after they turned 40.

It’s amazing to spend so much money and not live the American dream. It’s my turn to have space, amenities and pay way less.

I’m having a hard time focusing right now. This is one of the days I hate the tip everybody in the building. I changed tip numbers etc so much that I left one envelope blank. He came up and started screaming at a doorman who has become a friend. I hope I didn’t start World War Three or get anybody fired. I feel horrible. Doormen gossip. A lot.

I won’t miss the greed in New York but I sure understand it. Though other cities have surpassed New York in expense, Manhattan is still the most expensive. My neighbors keep telling me “we think about it all the time, can’t believe you’re actually doing it.

My friend Carol who I refound through the personal development blogroll left the Village for Santa Cruz

New York Magazine has reasons to love New York. They’re all valid especially the doormen one, but uh, does everybody either live in a fringe hood in an outer borough or make hundreds of thousands a year?

Anyway this move is taking all my psychic energy I don’t know if I should put in my novel, put it in password protected posts or email it to people who are interested.

I don’t want people who really don’t want to comment to feel compelled to.

I’m doing what New Yorkers do when they feel overwhelmed and unsure of everything. I’m going to the movies. It beats drinking or drugs which at other times in my life…. I already took the long walk……

The movie was sold out. I went to Barnes & Noble and bought some books, including one on happiness, What Happy People Know as I’m into that, Atonement as I want to read it before seeing the movie and some true life murders. They’re my biggest guilty pleasure, but I have strict rules. Can never have heard of the murder, can’t be written at a Third Grade level, and I know I have some other rules.

The best true life murder selection can be found in a book store on the boardwalk at Venice Beach. Once I was going to move there. Now it’s South Carolina–but there’s always Amazon and there is a Barnes & Noble in Myrtle Beach, and an interesting “second hand” book store in a strip mall in North Myrtle. I’m going to be one with my inner strip mall. I did grow up near one and hated it. However there are actual streets, and I will be able to travel often.

It’s becoming scarier as the time grows closer.

Stumble it!

We’re entering week four. I’m usually very disciplined about writing, and haven’t been blocked since I discovered blogging. However I’m totally unfocused and crazed. Today I met one of my oldest friends at the Dean & Deluca in The Village. I think 2007 was a theme year for me. Reconciliation with my past and myself. Think it’s great to leave on a high note. I do think I had one too many coffee’s this week–never knew there was such a thing, and might turn into a tea drinker

Week three of the renovation–the apartment should be painted by the end of the week. Has a lot of molding and beamed ceilings. Next Monday and Tuesday is the sanding. The cabinet under the very adorable kitchen sink has to be replaced, and a zillion other things. The weather is yucky.
Went to a lecture last night with a friend on “how to sell your home.” Keyword being “home.” This is Manhattan. The lecturer gave examples of selling a coop his way. But no coop, that has to go through a board, can be sold in a month. It’s almost physically impossible.
The building staff has bets on how quickly my apartment will go. My doorman Fernando told me this morning he would have lost his mind in the first week. I’m beginning to hate Starbucks, but it’s near my house. I have lost my mind. In a good way

-Here’s a page with the prior chapters. I write the chapters in advance and add the words. They are true first drafts.

-West Virginia 2030
Cornelia needed a drink, cigarette, joint anything. What kind of hotel didn’t have a minibar, and a silver monogrammed RJ Reynolds smokeless-joint holder? The clothes were truly gross. This couldn’t be her room. She found a cherry red rayonette night gown and put it on with matching mules. Cornelia quickly and expertly put on makeup

She didn’t need the matching robe. Cornelia admired herself in the three way mirror in the dressing room. Skinny, so skinny. The night gown was a bit too big. She would never buy something that didn’t totally cling to her body. Her hair felt soft from the minerals in the swimming pool. Once swimming pools didn’t have skin softeners. She should take a shower but wasn’t in the mood. She tried to open the suite door and go to the hotel lobby.

Why couldn’t she open the door? She needed air badly. Cornelia opened the patio door and breathed in the fresh air, not realizing she was in a converted mine shaft. She sat on a chaise, watched the sun go down and thought that the pink sky meant tomorrow was going to be hot. She had to get to the ocean beach, but first she needed to relax. Stars there were so many stars.

“But I want it to be hot and sunny.’ Cornelia pouted to nobody in particular. One of Justin’s people was monitoring the room. She changed the enhanced holograms to “day” “tropical.” Soon Cornelia forgot that it had just been night. She took her nightgown off and was just wearing cherry thongs. People no longer got sunburned though most people still wore sunblock. Cornelia thought that very silly, a needless pretentious homage to an old world.

Cornelia looked in the solar operated mini-fridge next to the chaise. She had never seen one stocked solely with healthy energy, or calmness drinks before. Not an alcoholic drink or a Coke Freer to be found. She took a ginger raspberry fizz energy drink, and laid down on the chaise.

Cornelia tried to remember where she and Del had come to the hotel from. Why did her memory feel like swiss on cream cheese? Not that she had ever tried that….She didn’t seem to be able to hold onto a thought. Oh right, they must have come from….hadn’t it been a rainy day? They must have been in a traffic jam and the cars headlights had beamed rays of light on them. No, that was wrong. Stop thinking Cornelia. Del told her she didn’t have specific memories because she had been in an accident. No she was supposed to live for the here and now. She was specially chosen to brighten rooms and peoples lives. She smiled at that thought then pouted Brightness was good, but there was another kind. She was intelligent, very intelligent, wasn’t she? Stop thinking, Cornelia.

Thinking is the enemy of the elite, wasn’t it? She began to dance to hip hop playing in her brain. In a few minutes she forgot about Del.
*************
Justin, the ISB Behavioral Division head, Ona, and several behavioral specialists were having a virtual meeting. Justin was obviously agitated and kept walking with his back to the video cams. Ona told him to relax.
How can I relax when we don’t know what’s happening?
We’re analyzing the scans of the chip in Nell’s brain. It takes longer to do than with the real thing. The USC seems to have invented a virtual filter that covers the cerebral cortex and most of the brain. The actual brain scans….
How the f–k. How can they be so far ahead of us? They’re not just closing in on us; they’re taking over.
They’re not. You know we’ve been experimenting with brain filters. Give us 72 hours….
What if we don’t have 72 hours?
Justin, this is all new technology. Five years ago we never could have analyzed brains from video cam images. You have to talk to Nell. At this point every thing’s iffy. We don’t know if this is a psychotic break, organic brain damage or just a hallucination. You’re the person closest to her. Go along with the fantasy. Use Nadia if you have to. You might even have to use Del or Denny.
Del’s a gibbering idiot. Denny’s crazy and I wouldn’t sic Nadia on Bin Laden.
Justin, you have to work with what you have. The USC’s been perfecting mind control but we have more sophisticated equipment and better people. You were able to stun them all using stuns we perfected almost overnight from their prototype. Nell’s an intuitive, the best in the world. We have to believe that the real Nell is still there. She’s never lost a fight and isn’t going to now….
She’s been subjected to so much. Maybe this was the final indignity.
If you enter her world as it is now, you might be able to bring her back to her real self.
Might isn’t good enough.
It’s all we have.
••••••••••••••••••••
Justin unlocked the door to Nell’s suite. He saw her on the patio dancing to music only she heard. His heart was broken. Justin, the ultimate professional didn’t know if he could talk to her. He walked out to the patio. She turned around. Nell played with makeup for different occasions. She could look preppy, glamorous and everything in between. Cornelia’s eyes were rimmed with too much black. The black mascara was in clumps Her cherry lipstick exactly matched the nightgown, and thongs. She had put blush and the lipstick in round circles on her cheekbones. Nell would have used the cherry lipstick as a base toning it down with two or three other colors.
When they were younger Nell had pointed out women who wore blush in round circles. She said that was a give away for certain types of schizophrenics. He loved to watch Nell play with makeup. She could do it for hours and make herself look like all types of women.
It was one of the games they played. Nell, the wanton slut was one of his favorite characters, but this wasn’t Nell, anybody.
You, pool boy, did you bring cigarettes? A joint, some drinks?
He had taken a pack of Nadia’s cigarettes. Fortunately they had brought several cartons to the house. He handed her a cigarette.
You going to light it or just stand there, poolboy?
Oh of course.
She inhaled as if she were smoking a joint. He wanted to tell her to stop. She looked as if she were going to pass out. He helped her onto the chaise.
Are you alright?
Dizzy. Very dizzy, but….She felt her lips and ran into the room to a mirror.
What the hell? Why do I have this gross makeup on? Where are my clothes?
No, I’m not Nell. You know that. I’m–oh it doesn’t matter. Let me get this off.

She walked into the bathroom, and began taking the makeup off with cream.
Can you get me a robe?
He got the matching one.
No, something warmer. I’m freezing, and can’t believe I’m standing here talking to you, somebody I barely know dressed like this.
Who am I?
What an absurdly dumb question. You know who you are.
No I mean to you.
You know what you mean to me. We’re two strangers who meet once a year solely to have sex. Names are meaningless to us. So let’s have sex. The meter’s running.
No Nell that’s a game we play. We play many games like that. I’m Justin, your husband. You’re Nell….
Stop it, you’re making my head hurt. Truthfully I’m nobody and everybody. I have nor past nor a future. I exist to please you. Isn’t that what you want me to say?

Barren of makeup with a dusty rose chenille bathrobe, Nell looked young, and would have been beautiful if her expression hadn’t been both blank and scared.
Nell lets sit on the couch and talk.
I don’t want to sit on the couch and I have nothing to say to you. I’m not Nell and I have no idea who you are.
I’m Justin, your….
You keep saying that but if you were you would have my favorite music playing. You’d have my favorite food and this room would be decorated for me. I’m Cornelia, I am. You want me to forget that. You’re a cruel man, playing with my head.

He quickly ordered Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight.”
Too easy. Every woman loves that song.
He ordered “Ophelia,” “What a Wonderful World” and ten other songs.
You love 20th Century rock, blues, some jazz. Your favorite foods are lobster rolls, spinach sauteed in garlic, almost any kind of salad, especially Ceasar, and flourless chocolate cake made with the darkest chocolate and almost no sugar. Never regular lobster and the spinach has to be sauteed in olive oil. I’ll order them for you.
You will? You do know about me but anybody can find out that kind of information. Anybody can find out anything.
She stared at him as if she were looking at him for the first time and taking him all in.
You have a kind face. I feel, I feel as if I should know you? OK, do I always say “as if” instead of “like?”
Yes, actually you do.
And you find that endearing. It’s quaint like the 20th century pre-myutube American accents I can do.
Blanche DuBois. A Streetcar….They both said that at once and burst out laughing. She lit a cigarette and took a drag.
The cigarette, it’s making me dizzy. How do people smoke?
They get used to the carbon….
I know that. It was a rhetorical question. Are you always so literal? Is the food coming. I’m hungry, I think. I think that I’m not sure of anything. You say you’re Justin and I’m Nell. I don’t feel like a Nell and I don’t know you. Wouldn’t I feel something if we were married? Something more than my body craving yours? Nice people don’t say things like that. I’m not a nice person.
You’re not always the nicest person, but you’re the best person I know. Let me try to explain.
He told her a brief version of everything that had happened.
That’s crazy. If it were a book, nobody would read it. Hard copy or downloaded. You write books don’t you? Strange futuristic novels that everybody reads. Why should I believe anything you say to me? You lie for a living.

Justin didn’t know what to say. This was beyond him. All he could say was:
You know I write books.
Lucky guess. You look like somebody who would write sci fi books. I said you were successful to make you feel good.

The food had come. She bit into the lobster roll and spit it out.
You were wrong. I thought you were right I wanted to believe you, but I don’t like this. I don’t think I like food at all. I’m tired. I want that woman.
What woman?
You know, the woman who was going to help me find my prince. The woman who could help me see the light that had pretty angels. My doll. Do you have my doll. I need to talk to her.
Nell, I explained….
Who’s Nell? I’m Ella. I’m a princess, and the woman takes care of me. You’re a man. Men don’t know how to take care of princesses who are looking for angels.
Why are you here? Can you get the woman? I need her body.

She guzzled two more raspberry ginger fizzes. They had the antidote in them, but Justin knew the antidote was probably ten steps beyond whatever Nadia had put in the meds. In an hour Nell had gone from being Cornelia to somebody with a vague similiarity to Nell to Ella.

Stumble it!

Happy Hanukkah! Never sure how to spell it. See G at Central Snark for that. Until I move this blog is going to be all Colliding Worlds I will be posting on Wednesdays and Fridays or Sundays Fortunately for anybody who still has me on a feed I don’t edit it online. Just one draft, add the words and….
Moving because I want to, not because I have to, feels as if it’s the most incredibly egotistical debauched thing I have ever done. It’s not.

Here’s a page with all chapters so far. I write the chapters in advance and add the words. I’m having my apartment renovated to sell as I don’t want to inflict all of my quirky taste on prospective buyers. I don’t do well in chaos, and my life’s very chaotic. I posted the next chapter, by mistake–not doing very well.
I probably have mentioned that my parents took me to see The Three Face of Eve when I was seven. To this day houses with crawl spaces scare me. My parents had no idea why they took me. I accused them of child abuse as soon as I was old enough to understand that other seven years olds didn’t see movies like this, and am convinced it scarred me for life. I am fascinated by the brain.

West Virginia 2030
Nell tried to swim, float or tread water as she fell deeper and deeper into the pool. Her anti gravity shoes, so good for bringing blood to the brain, stymied her. Her last conscious thought was that nobody nearby noticed her or tried to save her.

Justin knew he had the upper hand with Nadia. She had spent her childhood and youth protecting Ilya, her genius yet socially retarded older brother from both bullies and people who tried to truly harm them. Once they had had come to America, Nadia had gone to nursing school while Ilya drew formulas in crayon all over their apartment walls. Nadia thought it a stroke of genius when she was able to assume the identity of Elisa Rosenthal, a doctoral student in chemistry. Slowly over the course of the first semester she introduced Ilya to the faculty. She got him a new identity, taken from a dead Russian emigre, Yuri, and told him it was a game they were playing, like when they “pretended” to kill people who got in their way. Ilya loved games. The faculty was amazed by his genius and didn’t mind that he didn’t often talk and when he did the words didn’t always make sense. The formulas always did.

Nadia went to school during the day as Elisa and went to work at night as Nadia. Hospitals paid graveyard shift charge nurses as much or more than many doctors. Nadia had an Internet business that flourished. Americans didn’t seem to take advantage of all the opportunities American capitalism provided. She didn’t need to study much. She could be absent from almost all classes, and no professor cared as her grades were so high.

Chemistry came easily to her. As did languages. She had found a book in ancient Greek when she was a child and taught herself the language. Ilya who hated all languages liked the look of the book. For some reason he was able to pick up the language from the many books Nadia had stolen. It was their secret language. Ilya loved secrets; he would only speak to Nadia in it. Ilya refused to use a computer. Nadia would have to find old-fashioned notebooks. He liked one notebook so much that Nadia had to buy all remaining books.

The chemistry faculty chairman’s daughter, Carol, was a moderate functioning Asperger’s sufferer who loved Ilya. They moved into an apartment in the chairman’s house. Nobody considered it strange that Yuri never talked about his past or anything really. He had a beautiful mind for chemistry. Carol and Yuri depended on her parents and Nadia to buy what they needed. Carol cleaned the rooms several times a day, but never Yuri’s study. He would write formulas on the walls. Nadia taught Carol how to clean it so that all of Yuri’s books and notebooks remained in the order Yuri placed them.

Justin hadn’t known any of this until recently. Nell had said that something was off about Nadia, that the background check was missing a lot, but her security clearance was so low, and she was so unimportant investigating had been a very low priority. How could they have missed a brother, and an entirely different life? The ISB was never sloppy. Justin wished that he had listened to Nell. Nell, where was she?

Nadia was turned half way toward the pool with a big smile on her face. Nell was lying face down in the pool. Justin jumped in. Nell felt like dead weight as he grabbed her and brought her to the surface. Nell wasn’t breathing. Justin administered CPR. She slowly came back to life, and coughed up much water.

Nell?
She had a strange look on her face. It wasn’t any of Nell or Ella’s expressions.
I’m not Nell. I’m Cornelia and I don’t know who you are.

She spoke more clearly than Ella ever had.
I’m Justin. You’re Nell. We’re married.

She laughed as she stood up:
I don’t know any Justins. Where’s Del? I live with him and we’re going to be married. But first I need to put on some dry clothes. Is this the hotel Del said he would take to me for a pre-honeymoon. Can you show me to our room? You’re awfully cute for a poolman. If Del’s not in the room, maybe we can f–k. First get these horrible shoes off me. Why are my clothes wet? Damn I want to get out of them.

Cornelia looked around: Oh there she is. I can never remember her name, but Del brings her with us to service us in every way. You know what I mean? If you’re not going to take off my shoes, I’ll get her to do it. I don’t do shoes. Cornelia winked at Justin.

Justin didn’t know what to say. For the first time in his life he knew what true shock felt like.
I can bring you to your room. She, she’s just a servant.
My servant you mean. Cornelia smiled a smile he had never seen before. Her eyes were too bright. She neither looked like Nell or Ella.
Whatever. Let me take you to your room.

Cornelia walked with a provocative wiggle. When they got to the room she quickly stripped out of her clothes.
Let’s not waste anytime. I don’t know when Del will be back. Funny I don’t remember this room, but what the hell. Where’s the bar? I would like some tequila straight up.
We, we don’t have any liquor here.
How horrible. Then I’ll take some weed or blow.
I’m sorry. We….
She slapped him hard. Justin almost fell.
Del will make sure that you pay, but first…Cornelia began to put her body close to his. He moved back repelled.
Are you scared of me? You shouldn’t be, I’m awfully good. I can persuade anybody to do anything.
Justin quickly walked to the door:
I, I have to get something. I’ll be right back.
Before she could say anything, he locked her in the room. As he called Max for help, he heard her scream words Nell would never use and Ella wouldn’t know.

Stumble it!

Next week’s installment gets funkier or something. Absolutely different.
Here is a page I made of all chapters with a sort of synopsis. I write them in advance, for fun, and add the words. I fixed the chapters that were out of order.
Writing this has rekindled my love of writing. I have been coming to the sad conclusion that it takes a rare person to be both a blogger and a writer. To be blogger/writer is more difficult as it entails much social interchange, and I can’t right now. I do so admire blogger/writers.

The page is on the sidebar and explains that the USA, in 2030, is controlled by eleven major corporations. I think I picked good ones–so read it, please. It also explains how Justin and the ISB got Nell, Nadia and Denny to the roof, and much more. Chapter 9 is in the page.
I’m moving this along and getting to the fun part for me. Oh yes I’m perverse and proud. Please take your time reading and don’t worry about commenting.
Colliding Worlds is set, for now, in New York in 2030
Nadia fell onto the floor. The stun gun would keep her out for hours. An ISB agent picked her up and carried up one flight to the roof where the helicopter was waiting.

Nell was more difficult to get out of the bed than Justin thought. As she looked at him with no recognition in her deep blue eyes, she bore her weight onto the bed. Justin didn’t want to stun her nor did he want to give her any more medications. He hadn’t thought getting Nell out of the room would be the most difficult problem. He couldn’t take seeing her this way.

The most exciting thing about Nell, aside from her looks and her love for him, had always been her intellect. There had been many times he thought her too bright for him or most of the world. Nell could size anybody in a second. People thought her psychic but she would say: “Intuition isn’t an ability to look and know. It’s based on judgment, experience and maybe something unknown. But I won’t know until I observe his behavior, and it would be good if you get him talking.” Justin would. He would sit in the classes at The ISB where she taught “learned intuition” and be amazed by her ability to get people to examine their deepest fears, and begin to get over them.

Justin and Nell’s mothers had gone to Lamaze class together. For eleven years he had taken her for granted. Justin never forgot the day in Sixth Grade she was walking down a hall as he talked to his best friend Denny. She was dressed in an over sized tee and leggings, as usual. Her face and hair looked the same. But all of a sudden he realized she really was a girl. They were friends yet he hated it when she spent Seventh and Eighth Grades dating his other best friend, Denny’s twin Del. He was happy when they broke up, but it took him until the middle of Ninth Grade to go out with her, and it was only because she asked him to go to a dance with her.

Justin had followed Nell then. Years into their marriage he felt as if he were still following Nell. She would wake up excited about the day’s possibilities, and go to sleep excited about what the next day would bring. When Denny had first betrayed them he felt her anger but watched in amazement as she played Denny. He didn’t want to take her back. He wanted to punish her for the pain he felt when she married Denny. He couldn’t.

Looking at her lying in bed with her wavy golden hair stringy, her once muscular almost zaftig body way too thin, and her expressionless eyes and face staring at the mobile over the bed, he felt too many emotions. He wanted to make Denny pay but more than that he wanted Nell back.

Max came into the room. He almost shoved Justin to the side as he picked Nell up from the bed. They couldn’t afford to lose any time. Justin followed them up to the helicopter. When it was in the air, he pushed a button that sealed the townhouse. Nobody would be able to get in or out until The ISB came later that night for the USC agents.

Twenty minutes later they arrived at their destination, a deserted coal mine in West Virginia that hadn’t been made into a glossy tourist town. One battle was over, but another had just begun. Nobody could tell Justin if the battle to save Nell’s mind would be the more difficult one.
Chapter 11
2030 Somewhere in West Virginia
The helicopter landed in what looked like a deserted coal mine. For the final two miles the helicopter became a bus. It stopped, and went into what looked like a shaft. The dim light gradually grew brighter. Max gasped as Justin showed him the house. Decorated in late 20th century post-modernist style, the house had faux windows with screens that showed beaches and mountains. The house had everything people could need for an extended stay including a full gym, infinity swimming pool and Koi pond off the entertainment room.

Ella didn’t know where she was. Things looked different but she wasn’t sure what they were different from. The full body massage chaise Justin put her in scared her. State of the art it could simulate many different types of massages including head messages. Her body and head tingled. Things came flowing through her brain. Something was different. The voice she always heard in her brain was gone. She didn’t like the voice, because it didn’t speak English, but was used to it. If people only spoke English life would be better. What life? Ella began to shake and not from the message chair. She heard the man who looked like the prince and the woman who was sometimes nice speak. She could even understand some of the words. They were talking across the room. She stared at the pond and wanted to get up and put some of the blossoms on her hair, but she couldn’t move.

Nadia had woken up to find herself tied to a bed. Justin was standing over her. Nadia coughed and spoke:
You think you won
Face it Nadia I have. You’re going to tell me what’s in the ingredients or you’re going to be tortured as you never were in Latvia. I know you tortured people to stay alive. I know you’ll do anything to live.
Nadia smiled
I can live with your beloved Nell staying Ella. I can live with being tortured. There’s nothing you can do that can make me tell, and the ingredients are all in my head. I don’t mind dying to keep Ella
You have a brother. You’ll do anything to keep him alive, and I know he helped you with the ingredients. He’s the genius chemist, not you.
Nadia searched her pockets for her contraband cigarettes. Cigarettes had become illegal ten years earlier. Cigarette companies made better profits by selling pot.
You don’t know what you’re talking about. My brother died a long time ago. Give me a cigarette.
Justin took out a 3D picture/hologram of Nadia and her brother a week ago. They were talking in ancient Greek.
Don’t have any cigarettes. Do have your brother. We know what you were talking about, we just need the final formula.
You lie. If you have my brother produce him.
He’s not here. You’ll have your chance to speak to him.

Ella began remembering things, but her memories were all a jumble. She was Nell who designed books and did something else. She lived with Justin on the Upper West Side, but that’s all she could remember. Nell didn’t want to live this way. Conversations floated in and out of her mind. Who was the woman with Justin? Was he cheating on her as he had with Anna when they were young?. She saw the swimming pool. If she could get out of the chair she could get to it and swim far away from everybody.

Nell willed herself to get out of the chair and into the swimming pool. Instead of swimming or floating she fell to the bottom of the pool.

Stumble it!

Here is a page of all prior chapters. The page includes a full explanation of the story.
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Colliding Worlds is set in New York in 2030.
Soon Ella was going to be Nadia’s. Nadia loved Rachel but couldn’t trust her. How did she know if Rachel was telling the truth? Rachel claimed that Denny thought Justin a mid-level ISB agent like him who lived in an intellectual fog, and was allowed in the townhouse under orders to tell nobody including his superiors about it. True Nadia had thought this was an ISB experiment and had never understood Justin’s position. He wrote two best sellers a year and owned Web Warriors. That seemed to occupy all his time. Even now he was playing games. If he truly loved Ella he would find someway to get her out. Continue Reading »

Stumble it!