Doug, my dawg of wonderful colors is on vacation. But he left an interactive post to help me design my new house. So help me please!!!
This is long and maybe a bit verbose but my heart is bursting. I forgot to say my apartment’s 600 square feet. Everything I did was with tricks and gives an illusion…
In Manhattan it’s always been about real estate and always will be about it. A good apartment with that intangible “wow” factor brings up the apartment’s worth immensely. Today’s consumer might be perfectly prepared on paper, but falling in love is falling in love whether with a person or an apartment.
*Actually I met them yesterday.
Ten years, seven and a half a months ago, on my birthday, I circled the ad that led to the first apartment I found that said to me: WOW, I HAVE TO OWN THIS. Continue Reading »
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Pia is exhausted. She does have the whitest bathtub in town–just reglazed–and can show the prospective buyers the three year guarantee. The Bank of Pia is back in operation as her “contractor” is sick. He kept saying that he would pay out of the money she gave him She wants the supplies out by tomorrow and for the contractor to pay for a cleaning service so the cleaning woman doesn’t have to do anything “dirty.”
Pia thinks her apartment might be ready by next week but damned if she can tell. It’s been so long she can’t tell up from down. Continue Reading »
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I updated my other blog. I’m doing all apartment stories, past and present, in it.
Somebody close to me believes I have no patience and expect people to do things when I snap my fingers. Most other people, close to me, think I’m a total jerk for having so much patience.
I should be submitting. I’m not for many reasons including paralysis, and fear, not of being rejected but of life itself. It seems as if it’s an endless to do list that I never come close to completing. The new sub contractor is supposed to be here at noon. “Do you have a point list?” my best friend asked. “Uh, if a point list is what’s to be done than I have it.” Continue Reading »
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Read my new blog. It’s funny and nothing like this. Ask for the URL. I just got a dotcom. Knowing me I will figure it out by 09.
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I don’t really care about offending other people. I do care that my life has been made unnecessarily difficult as I’m held to the same or higher standards than most people. Higher as my intelligence has always shined through. Yet just changing a server from one to another is a major technical issue for me.
Life’s not fair and nothing will ever change that. The blogosphere’s a compassionate place. I have seen that often. My problems are more spatially oriented than anything else. They led to high anxiety, panic attacks, and phobias. I have never been eligible for any services or disability.
My parents would have sued even then had I told them I was kicked out of Driver’s Ed for coming to school stoned. I never did and was too ashamed to tell them for twenty years.
I shouldn’t have had to live much of life in shame for things that weren’t my fault but were my problems. Now I’m coming to that final third of life. Though I have saved more than most people I have every reason to fear old age. I refuse to be a person society forgets or casts off with a “her, she’s different. Doesn’t count.” Nobody has said that iat least so I can hear in many decades. But I heard that too often when I was young.
I don’t like to post on this subject for two reason. It makes me depressed, and I guess I get depressed as the reaction is you’re not an autistic bi-polar transsexual with amputated legs so why are you complaining? I mean nothing against anybody with any or all of those conditions. Nor should I have to say that, but the blogosphere like popular culture reacts to sexy conditions. Preparing Brittney Spear’s obit is sexy–forget what paper or magazine is doing that. We’re such a frigging sick society.
Now that I’m in recovery mode, from the flu, I guess I’m angry. There are so many books about disabilities. So many blogs about problems. But the one I have NLD–non verbal learning disorders gets no publicity. There aren’t many blogs about. My new blog has nothing to do with it.
I don’t want this blog to be about it.
Yet it would mean so much to me if people began to discuss it. Honestly it hurts to go around the blogosphere and see every problem but this one discussed.
I know that people don’t like me to write about this. But few people are. Sometimes I have to. I do get many hits on my posts about it and sometimes even get wonderful emails. Continue Reading »
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Here’s a page to my novel being written online 
When I write about this disability I represent not just me but other people who have it. We have no spokesperson. The other day The New York Times wrote about disorganized boys as most people who are, are boys. Great I would be in school and have the same problems I had 40 years ago. Mostly it’s boys who are disorganized with bad handwriting, messy notebooks etc. Therefore I’m lazy and don’t try hard enough. Or the problem would be diagnosed but there would be no real help for me. There isn’t much help available for people with non verbal learning disorder. No role models of people who have made it. I have made it–with a lot of backsliding. Continue Reading »
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Chapter fourteen of Colliding Worlds is on the sidebar and in a page. Chapter fifteen will be up on Wednesday with or without the words.
It’s been a long time since we have had a talk with ourselves. We have been eating too many forbidden foods like pasta made from regular flour. We have been encamped at Lucia’s.
Yes and we were the perfect guest. When we asked Lucia if we snored as we had a headache and felt sinusy she said:
No, of course not. You farted all night.
No we snored. But just a bit. We made Lucia snore like us.
Lucia lives just off Broadway and we kind of live on Riverside, but we slept much better than we do here as it’s quieter. Hard to believe but Lucia can turn her heat off so the windows don’t have to be opened and closed all night. We get steam pipe bursts. And we live across from a school, a little private school where all the kids are well behaved unlike the largest middle school in the city we lived across from in Riverdale. We have to make sure that we don’t live near a school.
Uh, you’re saying something negative about your street and you never know who is going to read this. You don’t want to say anything bad about your apartment.
It’s yours also. And we’ve been saying bad things for over three years. But we have the nicest neighbors who we really should have taken the time to know before.
It takes from five to ten years to get to know the neighbors in Manhattan unless you have kids or a dog. We decided not to have either just to be friendly with people
But we’re just getting to know our neighbor who is a doctor and works with people with HIV. Our kind of person. And she’s so friendly, and we like each other so much. She gets our humor. Actually most people do in person, we just put it on hiatus. We went through a long spell of working with old people who complained and would compare them to our mommy. She never complained to the general public, doctors, nurses etc, just me and Elka. The etc. were usually social workers. OK she would tell social workers that her daughter was one and much more knowledgeable and brilliant. Really endeared them to us. But we miss our mommy and for some reason our father. Not that we didn’t love him much. Father’s died. Mommy’s lived.
We, all of us, want them to tell us we’re doing the right thing. Though mommy refused to believe that Greenpoint was cool. She grew up there and it was the last place she wanted to believe people really wanted to live in. Our father grew up in East Harlem and always thought it was cool. Back in his day. Please never let me grow into a person who can’t think a neighborhood can go up or down.
This isn’t the post to get all teary and miss dead parents in.
Why not? We have always wrote multi tasked posts.
The new generation of bloggers don’t get them
So?
We just said we didn’t want to get set in our ways.
But we don’t want to please. That’s not why we write.
Maybe you. I’m a recovering link whore.
You’ve been many kind of whores. Link whore was the tamest.
No it wasn’t. Oh let’s stop this. It’s almost Christmas Eve day where we get to listen to Christmas music all day and night.
We used to never say such things publicly. Back to the post….
Our apartment’s becoming beautiful again. But the floor guys forgot to put the cable back on–and did something so that the microwave and stove can’t be used though the circuit breaker looks fine.
We can live with disorder in the house now that we realized our mind is like jumbled knotted frayed wires. And we don’t know how to unjumble, unknot, unfray. That’s why we hire people. That’s why we’re leaving our really good life. So we’ll always have money to hire people.
Though our first day back in North Myrtle the TV and stereo didn’t work. First thing we checked as we have our priorities. Love to watch Horry County TV stations. Love living in a place called Horry County. It’s got that great Ho in the name. It wasn’t the circuit breakers, so we ran out and ran into Jerry in his pick up truck with “licensed” this that and everything. We offered to pay him. He wouldn’t take our money.
We don’t drive for the sake of humanity and refused to take cabs most places as we like to walk even in 90+ degrees. Especially in very hot weather. But we would have to take cabs sometimes, when we were dodging Jerry. Each time they would lower their prices. Not that we don’t like Jerry, we just didn’t want to be dependent on him or….
We think this is going to be a good move but we’re so obsessed and yesterday in the disorder thought we lost our passport and checkbook. We were crazed basically because we’ve been eating white food and things with sugar. Too much socialization. People keep telling us we’re going to be bored as we’re such social animals. OK, animal. We like solitude also and really miss it. We need solitude to refuel and rejuvenate. We’re not ashamed of that.
We feel strange. We wish we had allowed ourselves to be really happy before. Happiness is a choice. We figured that out last year or the year before and now we’re reading a book What Happy People Know that’s the first self help book we have ever loved. Though we have to say we have come to most of our thoughts on our own.
Ho Ho Ho–know how cheap that is but couldn’t resist. And a Merry Christmas to all.
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I have no idea where these pingbacks are coming from–they all seem to really be one blog, and a new form of comment spam. Some even have the same IP address. This is a post that is hard for me to post. I was thinking of turning comments and pings off as I often do, but was curious to see the types of comments I might get. I closed pings but not comments.
Once again I put a post into draft as it was poorly written and I don’t feel like redoing it. I can’t write a post I like.
I’m having a total anxiety attack. There is something I reach for when I do, but I try so hard not to.
Nobody thinks of me as a smoker. I’m not sure what a smoker is supposed to look like–not educated, not well dressed, not clean, not a good person, smells of cigarettes in body, mouth, hair and clothes. There are “closet smokers” who dress well in clothes that don’t smell of cigarettes, with bodies etc that don’t smell of cigarettes. Actually I couldn’t even go into bars and restaurants where smoking was allowed as I can’t stand the smell. They’re not allowed in New York basically anywhere and I don’t lament that. Continue Reading »
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I would like to kill thank Cooper for this. I have known Cooper since she was a 19 year old college girl with a blog. Now she’s a 22 year woman with a job and a blog. She has always had an incredible intellectual curiosity and a sly sense of humor; both traits that will take her far. Of course Cooper “called out” our beloved MizzyB so I cant 
I have been thinking about what “personal development” is. I see it often attached to the law of attraction. Saying that I believe in personal development and that you attract if you do X Y & Z, is a bit like saying I believe in mother’s milk, and apple pie. That’s over simplifying and I’m going to over simplify even more.
People claim that the only obstacles between us and success are our own fears and stumbling blocks. Maybe that’s true for that person and many people but it’s not true for many of us. Continue Reading »
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Boston Legal was at its most wonderful tonight. Showing people at their most human. Have a zillion things to say but have five more days and the weather is glorious and I’m feeling better and need to actually be out and about. Like people used to do on vacation. Or I’m told some people don’t work until 4-5 and then go out when away from home everyday. The things I learn in South Carolina. Continue Reading »
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The sidebar has a short post. I can change that post every day, but the main one twice a week. My rules, always subject to change and whim.
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This isn’t really about Fairway. It’s about how my mind works and how finally, after all these years, I have begun to find a measure of peace. Coincidentally or not, I was introduced to Susan P Koniack, the founder of Sarah’s-place.org
Read Susan’s story. It’s truly remarkable
Fairway is so crowded no shopping baskets or carts are available. I happen to be standing next to the man who is bringing them into the store so I grab a basket and venture inside.
My photoblog is being updated and does contain some pictures of Fairway.
Fairway makes its aisles too narrow on purpose. It’s all about product and nothing about design or comfort. It’s April but everybody is in their winter coats.
Were I normal, I would be bumping into people. I’m probably the only customer who is looking around me trying to gauge space. Should I move a millimeter to the right or left? Damn if I know. A woman gets ready to yell at me because she can’t move. Then she looks around. Almost nobody is moving. Continue Reading »
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