This is for this weeks 3WW Totally forgot to put it in! Me bad

I always start the story of Jeffrey and me with the day we met. That sounds normal until I remember I never start at the beginning. But that was one of the ten most incredible days of my life–and 50% of it happened before we met.

The allure of May 20, 1979 is simple. It was an incredibly beautiful day in the city everybody loved to hate. New York was supposed to be dangerous . I was out at all hours everywhere and my wallet was stolen once. I had just cashed my paycheck and everybody in my office pitched in to replace it. I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else though I dreamed of a beach house.

I walked from my apartment at 5 East 63rd Street, one of the best addresses in New York though the building itself had and would see better days to Folk City, the club that Marilyn, Robbie and Joe were soon to buy. Folk City was on 3rd Street near 6th Avenue then. It was dark and tobacco stained. With a bar filled with talking people. Peggy the lesbian bartender who married a man gave certain friends of the house triples, though Robbie refuses to believe that. I could hold my liquor. But never there. The Roches didn’t write “Face down at Folk City“(read the lyrics. First time I heard the song I cried from joy) because girls were sober.*

It’s easy to say Marilyn, Robbie, Joe and I are old friends. Truth, the unvarnished truth is always simpler or more complicated. When we were very young Robbie and I had been briefly married. We weren’t meant to be spouses. I had run to Europe to start my life over in 1971. I came home not because I missed him though I suppose I did but because I had a premonition a healthy friend would die. Together we couldn’t figure out how to warn him and JohnnyB died as I became engaged against my better judgement and married a few months later.

By 1979 we were long divorced and had become friends. I wanted Robbie to marry Marilyn; and I wanted to fall in love. It’s hard for many people to understand that I wished them every happiness. I liked, and like, them. Marilyn was perfect for Robbie in ways that I’m not. The once overbearing love I had felt for him had long ago turned to love for a friend. I’m human; I wanted what I saw they had. And I saw it before many other people. If I’m devoting too much time to this, I want it out of the way. It’s only important to the story because it took place in Folk City and Robbie played a part in Jeffrey and I meeting. It’s not even absurdest or ironic humor but truly funny.

Be careful what you wish for had been my motto since I began college eleven years earlier. I should have remembered it as I walked through the various districts Manhattan had then. The sky was a vivid blue; a perfect blue. It was hot but not humid. I was wearing new jeans and stopped at Macy’s to buy some Willie Smith clothes. I didn’t yet know why I went out of my way to buy clothes but they would play a part in the story also.

Then I walked through the flower district so gay in every sense. From his perch on a human’s shoulder, a parrot asked if I was happy and did I desire sex. Yes, I thought, but not with you. I was happy though had you asked me I would have analyzed the thought to death. I tended to over-analyze every facet of my life.

Was it Lucinda William’s debut at Folk City? I’m not sure though I have post upon post, unpublished article upon article about that day; the last truly uncomplicated day of my life.
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*In the 90′s I saw the Roches perform at Steven Talkhouse in South Beach. They asked how many people in the audience had been in Folk City’s basement–kind of infamous. I didn’t raise my hand but almost everybody else in the audience did. The people I was with looked at me as if I were crazy, but I didn’t want to be part of a pretend party.

That’s it. Photos in a few days.
Two Iranian Christian bloggers are missing. As I’m four fifths on an incredible natural high, one fifth scared I left the townhouse not perfect and three fifths crazed by the money I have been spending when I should be saving, truly horrible things are happening. I know my math was off; it’s just the way I feel
This is a photo of me and the boyfriend I call well lots of things. If it doesn’t link properly I will have it later.

We’re in Folk City in the late 70′s. I met Jeffrey (his real name) when one of the soon to be new owners of Folk City, Robbie Woliver told me I had to come back the next day to see a girl who was better than incredible. My friend Helena and I had stopped by after dinner at Panchito’s a greasy horrible cheap Mexican restaurant that was very beautiful (I think) and everybody loved though if you didn’t eat your food in two minutes it congealed. Most people really went for the endless chips, dips and frozen Margaritas.

People liked hanging with me because well I hope they enjoyed me and I had contacts at all pivotal clubs in Manhattan. It was strange. I even knew Marc the doorman at Studio.

Helena lectured me because I was working twelve to fourteen hour days six days a week. I had recently been promoted to supervisor in a computerized litigation company and loved my job. But Helena was right. I realized the next day I wanted a boyfriend and set out to get me one. I have written in depth about the walk from 63rd & Fifth to the Village. How I stopped at Macys and bought new clothes–as it turned out it wslucky for me I didn’t have to go to work in the same clothes.

Yes those were the days I would think “I want a boyfriend” and despite my extreme shyness one would appear. The same thing happened with weight. “I want to lose 20 pounds,” and I would. Now–well I really try with the weight thing and it’s more manageable but the other thing….If you don’t try….and sadly I didn’t have to learn the skills.

The girl was Lucinda Williams. She and Jeff were friends from New Orleans and he suggested she send Moses Ash of Folkways a demo tape. Jeff had a recording contract with them. She didn’t become real famous for another decade at least but Rob was right; she blew the audience away. It was a star studded audience; filled with recording artists, producers, reviewers. I was in music groupie heaven. Problem was I could never be an actual groupie type. I was more the girlfriend type. I was shy. Robbie would come over and tell me that so and so wanted to meet me–he would come over constantly. I would smile demurely. Sometimes I want to hit the girl I was and tell her–all you had to do was smile at the guy–not Robbie. I always said I had to be hit over the head.

Jeff was the only one who came over and told me a bad joke. I’m a total sucker for bad Polish jokes. It was the 70′s and Jeff and I moved in together two days later. I plead the 70′s defense.
The thing was Jeffrey was sexy. Real sexy for the time. I felt as if I had been hit over the head by–I’m not sure I can describe the feeling. All my girlfriends were impressed. Very impressed. All my male friends disliked but tolerated him.

Jeff was the only one who came over and told me a bad joke. I’m a total sucker for bad Polish jokes. It was the 70′s and Jeff and I moved in together two days later. I plead the 70′s defense.

I have written a lot about Jeffrey. I did love him. For about six months he made me happier than I could imagine being. I think I did the same to him. I really didn’t mean to write this much.

This post was written under the influence of “I bought a house, sweated the renovation, and paid for everything, and wow, my life is becoming exciting once more. Only this time I’m in charge.”

Alphabet Kidsis the first book to discuss every known, at this time, developmental, neurobiological, and psychological disorder.

It’s both easy to read and very informative. The introduction more than hooked me. It’s a wonderful read that stresses the parents journey as he attempts to learn about the spectrum.

Alphabet Kids are like snowflakes: It seems that no two are alike.

Thank you Robbie for acknowledging that.

The book covers “problems” in alphabetical order, and is an OCD’s delight, she says knowingly. The chapter begins with “terms used“, second is “sound familiar? or an individual story. (The one on page 299 is mandatory reading. Third is Did you know? Or great facts. Signs and Sypmptoms, cause, diagnosis,, treatment,prognosis, and finally sources and resources. Each section is informative and I believe very helpful.

Damn do I wish books like this had been around when I was younger. Or that any book on “problems” was written with the empathy and clarity Robbie Woliver does.

People are so damn quick to judge. Somebody said most parents will read this book simply because of ADD and ADHD. They are but two of many many disorders in the spectrum

I know parents–some incredible bloggers who are desperately searching for answers
href=”http://www.amazon.com/Alphabet-Kids-Developmental-Neurobiological-Psychological/dp/1843108801/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1229465147&sr=1-1″>Alphabet Kidsis the first book to discuss every known, at this time, developmental, neurobiological, and psychological disorder.

It’s both easy to read and very informative. The introduction more than hooked me. It’s a wonderful read that stresses the parents journey as he attempts to learn about the spectrum.

Alphabet Kids are like snowflakes: It seems that no two are alike.

Thank you Robbie for acknowledging that.

The book covers “problems” in alphabetical order, and is an OCD’s delight, she says knowingly. The chapter begins with “terms used“, second is “sound familiar? or an individual story. (The one on page 299 is mandatory reading. Third is Did you know? Or great facts. Signs and Sypmptoms, cause, diagnosis,, treatment,prognosis, and finally sources and resources. Each section is informative and I believe very helpful.
******
The story on page 299 wasn’t written by a sixteen year blogger who “got” NLD wrong. I’m not usually hurt when people get my wrong or are critical of my writing. In this case I should feel flattered as I channeled my inner sixteen year old to write that. Nowhere does it say that I’m sixteen. It says that I’m successful (yes) and a popular blogger–I would have disagreed with that but I looked at my stats for the first time since July and uh….I no longer live in New York.

Until two years ago I didn’t know what was wrong with me. Knowledge is power. It took several months to adjust and then I began trying to sell my apartment. Sometimes I think I sold the last one bedroom in Manhattan for a half decent price–maybe the last apartment. I moved to a new city by the ocean where it was in the 70′s today. I’m meeting with the contractor who is renovating my new house tomorrow and this isn’t going to be a horror story.

I try not to focus on what I could have been had I known earlier and to focus on the present. 95% of the time that works.