Anger doesn't become me

Yesterday in my post I said that I was angry. That was true for a hot second. I can get all fired up when writing.

Truth is I hate being angry. It’s a waste of time. When I walk down my block I always have this stupid smile on my face because everybody I don’t personally know who lives in my building looks alike to me. Building resident! Say hello!

I do get fired up about things and totally riled. But I try to save my anger for causes and even then try to look rational. Because the truth is nobody likes, respects or wants to work with an angry person. Nobody ever had to teach me that about the work place. it’s just places like New York streets when they’re crowded, or my always mentioned store from hell, Fairway, that I sometime dream about killing people in.

Fairway, the only in New York grocery store from hell has everything a person could possibly want at a small, small discount. Well extra virgin olive oil for $7.99 a liter is a big discount but olive oil tends to go rancid so unless you have a family, and use it every night or entertain constantly and actually cook, it’s not worth it.

Fairway is a store that can easily anger a person. The check out lines can go down through the aisles. They have expeditors to tell you what number cashier to go to. Many people pretend not to see the lines, and try standing near the checker. Bad move as at least 20 people will tell them in no uncertain terms where to go.

The other day the store was so crowded people were stepping on each others toes. I couldn’t get to most aisles that I wanted to go to. I felt like screaming but I had my smile on-sort of like putting on lipstick, it’s become a don’t leave home without it thing.

I was the first person on one of the aisle lines. The woman behind the woman behind me, kept on screaming that I was letting people go in my stead. That’s something that might happen in another lifetime.

All I could do was smile and point out the expeditor. Didn’t help. I was holding up the line. End of story.
Kept on saying: I’m not going to lose it; not going to lose it, not in Fairway. The woman behind me and I went to cashiers at the same time.

For some reason we looked at each other and couldn’t stop laughing. You really don’t want to lose it at Fairway because it’s so easy to and such a cliche. Also you never know who is shopping in the store. There could be everyone from an old lover to the coop board president to the agent you want to pitch a book to, to Broadway stars, to a relative you haven’t seen in years.

Ever since I decided on the smile my way through life approach, I’ve been a much happier and calmer (usually) person. It’s true that putting on a smile though faked can make you actually feel better. Maybe because people can’t help but respond to a smile with one of their own. Even in Fairway.