Adoption and Google

Courting was the top Google search in “don’t like an adoptive family.”

This is sadder than sad. It’s sickening

This is a big deal to me. Usually I ignore Google searches that are so wrong. Usually I find them funny.

This is personal

It negates my life.

I understand that just reading the summary shows my true feelings. But I have gotten comments I didn’t understand, and deleted, until I saw the Google search they came from. Some people only read the header and feel compelled to comment. Yes, they’re idiots–don’t even read the summary. Or decide that the Google search term is more valid than the written document. Idiots!!!!!

If I’m overreacting, this is one week of the year, I’m entitled to miss my parents who I loved very much. They always made a big deal over birthday month. My mother made sure that my six week sleep away camp didn’t begin until a day or two later. She didn’t have the power to start and stop camp dates. But it was important to her that I spend my birthday, my real birthday, not my date of adoption at home until I was about thirteen.

They were my only family. There are many times that I wish my father hadn’t been so curious and practically found my birth mother for me. I have written too often about the problems that were supposed to be caused because I was resistant to being adopted. If as much time had been spent on looking for the real problems, I might be an improved version of myself

Being adopted wasn’t central to my life. My parents didn’t believe in secrets and thought it might benefit me if they told the school etc. There were years on end when we all would forget about it.

I came of age with the adoption movement and it was very “in” to hate your adoptive parents. Though I had two adopted friends who didn’t as most adoptees didn’t. The disgruntled usually are more vocal. Things like ADD weren’t really ADD in adoptees but part of the adoption process. I did link to an anti-adoption site in that page. It says more than I ever would willing to say.

I have been to meetings where people almost physically attacked both adoptive parents and agency reps.
“Oh, Pia, you had a unique experience.”

Damn straight. Every family is unique. Mine happened to be more unique than most.

Maybe that’s why I loved my family so much.

My blogging friend Jonathan and Wendy, his wife are adopting. Jonathan writes about the process. It’s intrusive. It’s difficult.

My mother told me that they were asked about their sex life.
“Well, Pia, they had to know that we had one.”

Anybody who spent half hour with my parents knew they had one. Aside from the make out sessions in not upscale restaurants my sister and I were privy to, they had a look about them….They didn’t find that question or any intrusive. They accepted them because they wanted a child that badly–

Oh on Thursday I will also post My father’s letter upon adopting me. I keep trying to explain to Bone that I can’t put it in a book about my life as it was my father’s words–I will put it in somewhere.

I’m not going to sue Google as my sister suggested. I am going to send them that page and a strongly worded letter suggesting that they get their robotic whatevers to make sure that the phrase on top of the page actually match the documents.

Oh, I’m thinking of my blog as a document. Maybe my sister….