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Bless you(r) heart, Miss Pia, you look divine….

July 21, 2009 By pia

i just returned from New York and had some life changing experiences so forgive me for getting the expression wrong. It is “bless your heart” Why bless my heart I can’t even get a stupid expression right–but am in such a good mood I don’t care. And love the newest changes to WP 2.forever.
“Why bless you, Miss Pia, you look divine”
Shit, I really need to lose an incredible amount of weight, get work done on my face, whole body, a new hair stylist. Wait it’s my hair stylist’s mother, who not so coincidentally happens to be my nail technician, telling me this.

“Why thank you Miss Edna” I don’t have the whole “Miss” thing down. I don’t think I’m supposed to say it to her as she’s nine years younger than I am but looks nine years older so…

I’m beginning to get true Southern lingo down. Any woman who says “bless you” to you is really politely dissing you especially when they belong to the Church of Harley Davidson. That’s not true. I just like the sound of the last part of the last sentence. They’re dissing you when they’re not-so-true Church ladies with no time for anything but Church and gossip.

I do love it here. Loved my ten days in New York and plan on writing about them but am oh so happy to be home. And this is home now. It really is. For some reason I find that one fact awe inspiring.

If my nail technician happens to read this for some ungodly reason please know that I adore you. You have never said anything like that but do worship at The Church of Harley….and by the way I don’t know how to tell you I can’t afford you. $60 for a mani/pedi no matter how great, and yours are to die for, is just too much. In New York, you can get them at any street corner for $19.99. It’s one of the two more expensive things here and I forget the second.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: adjusting to the south, living in the South, Southern manners

« I unpack my last two suitcases and find a mountain to climb out of
3WW: Darkness; patronize; weaken–Monkey on my back; yes I love cliches especially drug ones »

Comments

  1. Doug says

    July 21, 2009 at 7:38 pm

    I’m not fluent in South Cackalackian, but I think it’s “bless your heart” that’s a surpressed insult. Just helping however I can.

    Now. To repeat for those who weren’t aware, a belated happy birthday!

  2. cooper says

    July 21, 2009 at 10:31 pm

    They do love their Harley’s, but it’s good to know the “bless you” is really a dis.

    Yea some things in NY are cheaper believe it or not. I do not want to see a picture of you with blond hair and long designer nails anytime soon. I would have to coordinate an intervention.

  3. Bone says

    July 22, 2009 at 9:38 am

    It seems to be accepted here–and possibly even considered polite–that by adding “bless his/her heart” to any statement, you are allowed to say anything about a person.

    Yes, happy belated birthday!!!

    And let us know when you remember the second 🙂

  4. Jacob says

    July 22, 2009 at 12:47 pm

    The “bless you” is a clever ruse that’s for sure.
    Nice to have you back, and almost southern

  5. helene says

    July 24, 2009 at 5:13 pm

    You are funny… I am with Doug, the thing I remember about southerners is that they can totally dish you and you think they are being nice!

    In this case, I am sure you looked wonderful and she meant it in all the nicest ways! lol

    Glad that home is feeling like home and that its good to be there! =]

    I always get my nails done in NYC at the cheapy Asian places… 10$ for man, 25 for both man/pedi! Havent been there in a year or so sadly! Not sure what I am waiting for… perhaps an invitation! lol really i think that is it… from a friend of mine… but it wont come, so I should just get a room and go!

    Perhaps in Sept. NYC is great in Sept!

    Have a great weekend!

  6. TC says

    July 26, 2009 at 11:49 pm

    They’re dissing you when they’re not-so-true Church ladies with no time for anything but Church and gossip.

    You REALLY do have it down, don’t you?!?! Though I think that’s true in the Midwest, too. Or at least it was in the church I grew up in.

    PS: $60 for combined? I’m jealous!

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About Me

I live in the South, not South Florida, a few blocks from the ocean, and two blocks from the main street. It's called Main Street. Amazes me too.

I'm from New York. I mostly lived in the Mid-Upper East Side, and the heart of the Upper West Side. It amazes me when people talk about how scared they were of Times Square in the 1970's and 1980's.

As my mother said: "know the streets, look out and you'll be fine."

What was scary was the invasion of the crack dens into "good buildings in good 'hoods." And the greedy landlords who did everything they could to get good tenants out of buildings.

I'm a Long Island girl, and proud of it now.
Then I hated everything about the suburbs. Yet somehow I lived in a few great Long Island Sound towns after high school.

Go to archives "August 2004" if you want to begin with the first posts.

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