Never know if it’s me or not

I recognize and accept that somethings in my life will always be impossible for me to do.  I understand I will have to spend the rest of my life explaining why I don’t drive; that hardware and learning things such as HTML might as well be advanced physics and calculus.

But damn when I pay for things I want them to work.  I don’t want to spend a year staring at an incredibly beautiful shower that cost thousands of dollars plus I bought a new water heater for more pressure when the pressure is abysmal.  I use the upstairs shower I spent nothing on.  Then the plumber caused floods after he told me I had pin hole floods.  The floods were a few days later and he didn’t return my calls for days.  Said he didn’t have my numbers.  I know I left them but maybe he didn’t get them.

I want the netflick DVD player to work–after two tech calls that did cost me money.  I don’t want the cable company to constantly tell me “it’s your TV” when I had the Geek Squad come and check it out.

Getting things done properly costs money and I’m willing to spend the money but only if everything works when finished or after the service call.

I guess it’s time to face facts.  Do the techs really work or decide that I’m a ditz and therefore…?  Does the plumber feel no responsibility for causing floods, that cost me almost a thousand to fix?  I’m not even talking about the pressure because I’m a single woman who has non verbal learning disabilities (NLD)?   It might be an invisible disability but sometimes I feel that I wear a sign around my head “ditz,” “idiot,” “don’t take her seriously.”

Not having the social problems that so many people with NLD have might make it worse because I don’t expect to be treated poorly.  And, honestly, lately I can’t tell if I’m experiencing a series of stupid problems that anybody would experience–and be bitchier than I am being, threaten to sue–maybe even go through with the law suit. Or are these problems specific to me?

I can watch the movies on my computer but why did I buy a TV and DVD player then?  Am I wrong for caring?  And damn I want that shower working properly.  It’s Eldon’s responsibility and I told him I don’t want to involve him in a law suit but he didn’t spend the money nor does he spend a half hour a day staring at a thing of beauty that just can’t get itself it together.